Letter to Grammy Oct. 20, 2002

It was so good to hear from you. Today, the Lord really worked a miracle for me. I had just gotten back to school because I went home for the weekend. I must admit, I did not want to leave home and I was feeling depressed. When I went over to the practice facility, I saw a letter sitting in my locker. After I had read your card, I felt so fulfilled. I don’t think I ever felt so much relief in all my life. I practiced great and I feel 100% better right now. I wasn’t going to tell you this because I am such a “tough guy”, but I couldn’t finish reading your letter because I felt like I was going to cry…

I hung the card up in my locker and already I’ve had a few of my teammates come over to me and tell me it is a beautiful picture. I am going to go buy a frame this week so I can put it in my room. I’ve got a Bible, but it is only the New Testament. I would like one for Christmas.

You truly are a blessing from God. Your reminders of what the Lord is doing for me are very helpful too. Thank you so much for making my day, I do thank the Lord also. I can’t wait to see you again.


Email to Dad 3/20/2003
Thanks for the article. I know where I stand in the eyes of the media and the public, but I also know where I stand in my own mind. So far I feel like an entire different player in spring ball. It is becoming a game again and not Hell. I am working myself back into shape and I am more soar everyday than I have ever been, but it will all pay off. Strength wise I am still building my legs back up, but my upper body is stronger than it has ever been. I'm not trying to earn anyone's respect but my own. Everyone else's respect I am gonna have to take, so thanks for adding a few more chips to my shoulder. I'll be sure to take care of them all the best way I know how to. Tell everyone I said hey. Talk to ya later, I have practice.


Christmas Card 2001
Merry Christmas Dad, Thanks for teaching me to be a man. Now we move on to shock the world. Thanks for everything,


7th annual Urbana Football Banquet Feb. 2002
Thanks to God for my desire and opportunity. To Mom and Dad for the love, leadership and care. To Michael and Nicholas; it’s all in the family. To Natalie for the love and support, you’ve helped me grow. To my team, who is my family, thanks for the memories. Good luck to you all in life. And to the “Group”, we will live on.
My greatest memory was crying tears of joy as Urbana stared into the tear filled eyes of our defeated opponent Seneca Valley. My future plans are to break and set countless records as I prove the non-believers wrong again and again at the University of Pittsburgh and beyond and live my life to it’s fullest with the ones I love. Urbana is a Unit. These have been the greatest times of my life. Despite my attitude, I love you and I appreciate every moment I’ve spent as an Urbana Hawk.

1st Annual MD All-State Banquet Feb. 10, 2001
It is truly an honor being selected to the Associated Press All-State Football Team for the State of Maryland. I’ve been playing football sense I was 9 years old, as a kid I always played with and against kids older and bigger than me. So I no longer fear getting pounded. When I was in the sixth grade, I played on a Montgomery County team where I won MVP as QB and Middle linebacker. After that taste of glory, I knew I’d never settle for less than the best from myself. I entered Urbana high school as a tailback on the freshman team. That year the varsity team won Urbana’s first State Championship. I knew I wanted to be part of the varsity team because I wanted to be part of the best. I set a goal as a freshman to work hard to get a starting position on our varsity team as a sophomore. As it turns out Urbana had one of the best tailbacks in the state, Alex Herbert, so I decided to try for receiver and I’m so thankful Coach Carruthers was willing to give me a chance. The next season, not only was I a varsity player, I was a starting varsity player catching passes from Zach Mills, the greatest QB that has, thus far, come out of Urbana. I was a part of taking our team to its second consecutive State Championship. That year I earned Second Team All-State small school; first team All-Conference, First-Team All Area and All-Gazette. As a junior, playing with another great QB (and kicker) Josh Brown, I was a part of helping my team to a third consecutive State Championship and earning All-State Consensus Honors. With my new training program, this off-season feels like a football season to me. I hope to help win a forth-consecutive State Championship in my senior year and I definitely plan to play football in college, my prayer is that it’s a Division 1 program.

Interview with Pittsburgh Post-Gazette on punt returns. Fall 2002
“You have to be a little crazy to do it because you get banged up so much, but I love that contact. In fact, I look for that contact. I love to get hit, and I have no fear back there. That’s a good start. I know I’m close to breaking one, and frankly I feel like I have what it takes to be a great one.”

July 13, 2001 Interview with easternrecruiting.com after scholarship offer from Pitt.
"You will get turned down more than accepted, so let it all add fuel to your fire. Never get down and you will not be defeated. Fear no one and always believe you are the best.”

July 18, 2001 interview with MDvarsity.com after running 4.22 at Nike camp.
"I definitely surprised myself, no one expects to come out of nowhere and be the fastest in the nation, but I was on a mission. With the adrenaline rushing it just pumps you up. “I have the attitude that when the ball is in the air, I have to get it". “I’m excited, I want to get down to business now, we’re gonna be good again. With our coaching and dedication, I have a lot of confidence in the team.”

February 26, 2001 rivals100.com
“I’d say I play a style of ball like Tim Dwight of the Atlanta Falcons and Jermaine Lewis of the Baltimore Ravens, Dwight is my favorite player. They’ re both small guys who just know how to get the job done on the field.”

May 1, 2001 wolfpacker.com after nike camp.
“I felt my performance in the 40 reflects how badly I want to be the best. My times were faster than I expected them to be, but I had some high expectations set for myself and it feels good to reach them.”

May 23, 2001 easternrecruiting.com
“I know I’m going to have to go to camps and prove myself. They can’t believe a guy my size can do the things I do. I feel like I’m the toughest man on the field and I play with passion, I may look small, but I play like a giant.”

“The Chanters Scream On” (Poetry.com wanted to print this in “The Sound of Poetry” collection, Just 2 weeks before his death)

Just the other day I took a walk down the street and see Uncle Sam with 10 foot stilts attached to his feet. Behind him are 100 other fools chantin something about how we need Jesus out of our schools.
Then I looked up and I swear the Devil was lookin at me, whisperin, “Let’s save Saddam, he hates he who is free.”

The Chanters scream on, “War is wrong!”. Well I think the battlefield is where we all belong.
Innocent people die everyday. Maybe it’ll help if some schools decided to pray. When I see these chanters it takes all I got to hold back.

How the hell did they feel when our country was under attack?

Poetry to Natalie

“Do You Remember the Time”
Do you remember the time - When we fell in love - And we made that wonderful climb - To the Heavens above - And brought it down here to earth - So that we could give our life - That new Holy birth - That got rid of all our strife - And delivered happiness and peace - So that our souls could be released - Do you remember the time - Our hearts connected as a whole - All belongings of me became yours - And we were both overcome - By that indescribable feeling of words - That can only be called love - It was a day that began - A life of together that won’t end - Do you remember the time - When we fell in love

Any emptiness you see in my eyes - Exists only in pictures past - Because I now have an Angel in life - And a love that forever lasts - Thanking the Lord is now a habit - For my wishes have all come true - I asked god to give me the light - And the Lord sent my heart to you - You are an Angel, and my eyes are full - Full of devotion - I’m devoted to loving you

“First Kiss”
The day that remains in my heart forever - Exists because of one moment I’ll always remember - It is the moment your soft lips first met mine - The feeling I got was more than just fine - Before that kiss I thought we’d only be friends - Friends were OK, but I longed for more in the end - You were a hurt soul that only I could heal - My heart was locked up waiting for you to steal - So I said goodnight, and hugged you like a pal - I had no idea you wanted to be my gal - My shyness took over as I turned away - But the look in your eyes welcomed me to stay - And then with no words, our lips came together - That kiss sealed a moment that will last forever - Now as my best friend, you are mine to hold - And our heart and soul are mine to console - But there is no end to this lasting love - That moment over eternity rises above - Natalie, you are my girl and my best friend - I’ll love you forever, far past the end

“If Tomorrow Weren’t to Come”
If tomorrow weren’t to come - Here’s what I would say - Natalie, thank you - For giving me this day - This one day in life - Exists because of you - I have been a man - Devoted to you
Your name is beautiful - Your soul is true - My existence is yours - My hero and savior - You affect my every word - My every thought and behavior - You have given to me Courage,
Strength, Honor, and Love - You are Heaven’s bird - You are my sweet dove - Natalie, I love you - And in heaven we’ll meet again - To live out eternity - From beginning to end

“Served and Through”
Some say the tough times bring us down - Many just look at the rough times and frown
But I think about the paradise you’ve given me - And heaven is the only word that can describe what I see - For I know our future is unending - All the hurt I’ve felt is healed by your mending - It does not matter if down times come this way - I’ll never feel pain, fear, or dismay - Because with you, I can fight a war - Together we can erase from this world all the soar - I need no more and I’ll expect no less - You’ve already defined for me the meaning of best - My purpose on earth will be served and through - As long as it’s spent devoted to you

"Where Ever I Go"
Wherever I go, you will be with me - Because you have my soul - And my soul must come with me - Even if I can’t touch your hand - In my heart and in my mind - Together we will stand - Each day we spend physically apart - Will be all right - Because each day will restart
By saying a prayer - Thanking God for you - The one and the only - Who will keep me true
So if you look to your side - And I am not there - Please do not weep - Do not shed a tear
Because I will always be with you - For it is love that we share - Just remember the sun will always rise - And one day soon God will grant us our prize - Hand in hand we will be - together - It is a promise - A promise that will last forever.

Every present ticking second has got to turn to past. To me, this cannot matter less. As long as this love will last. Unknowingly, I wound up. Gave my heart a cast. She came along and took it in. Oh so very fast. Into those eyes I gazed. The sadness shows her heart’s been passed. Instantly, I realized. She’s as fragile as precious glass. So I gave a promise. A commitment that will last. Tomorrow forever is our future. Together we’ll smile at our past.

“Remember Me”
Remember me, when them guys come pressin. Remember me, when they all try messin. Remember me, when you think about the past. Remember me, you and I will last. Remember me, when the stress weighs you down. Remember me, when you feel that sad frown. Remember me, when you feel the soft wind blow. Remember me, every time you take a stroll. Remember me, because I’m dreaming about you. Remember me, because our love is so true. Remember me, as the man who loves you.

The moon shines bright. As evening fades to night. Stars come out from hiding and supply the dark with light. We lay under the moon, just you and me alone. And watch the mist rise from the field, as the breeze plays us a tune. We’re hanging by this moment and we’re both feeling so fine. Chills sensate our minds, as your body touches mine. Love is how we connect, so slowly I kiss your neck. The Goosebumps shoot down your legs, from just a little peck. The pleasure we give each other, is so incredibly true and it is all due to the fact, that I love you.

“Infinite Love”
She Glistens in brightness, brings brightness to dark. Nothing can compare, to the love in her heart. I lay in amazement at night and I pray Natalie, with me forever must stay. Just look at this world. Look at everything of it. My lady alone, rises above all it. I strain to describe, the pleasure she brings me. It’s hard to find words worthy of describing my baby, but there are three in which I know are so true Natalie. I know you hear me. I have infinite love for you.

When I gaze at you, and you don’t know why. It’s because your beauty has me mesmerized. I get short of breath, and dizzy in my head. All from just three words you looked at me and said, your whisper, “I LOVE YOU,” so I thank God. I tell you I need you, as I gratefully nod. Sometimes I feel I could float away with you by my side. I have so much to say, but there are no words, or language I’ve heard, that can describe you; you are an angel, a heavenly bird. Thank you Natalie, and thank you sweet Lord. I never knew this feeling existed before, so please let me stare and know, I’ll forever be there.


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